Brilliant Excuses To Seduce Your Best Friend
by insincerealgai
Summary: Join Sirius Black as he comes up with reasons to seduce James Potter, his current best friend. After all, it's not his fault the entire female population hates him and that he gets horny at odd intervals of the day... JP/SB


Brilliant Excuses to Seduce Your Best Friend: Chapter One

Excuse No. 1: Boredom

In the life of a Marauder, there weren't many things to fear. Generally, people tended to fear _you._ But there were some things that each Marauder feared. Maybe it was just a Marauder "thing", but their fears tended to revolve around Sirius Black, one of the infamous Marauders.

For example, James Potter, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew were always terrified whenever Sirius had too much sugar on Halloween and badly sang Britney Spears songs until four in the morning, into which he would pass out on the floor. The three were terrified when Sirius became so drunk that he failed to recognize what gender anyone was, and started flirting with James – and sometimes even Remus. All because he was _bored._

So naturally, James Potter was absolutely _horrified_ when Sirius announced that he was bored on one innocent, Saturday afternoon. Especially considering that Remus was away tutoring Peter, so _he_ was the only other option. Merlin, they needed to expand their social circle so that they could give Sirius scapegoats for whenever he grew bored and the three other Marauders wouldn't be scarred for life, which was usually the case.

But instead of freaking out like Remus always did, James calmly hid his fear and asked, "So, what do you want me to do about it?" in a very Lily-ish way.

"Entertain me!" he whined, his lower lip quivering as his dark brown eyes grew wide. It was the way Sirius looked at him, the infamous 'puppy dog pout' that eventually won James over.

James sighed. It was Saturday, it couldn't be all bad, right? "Sure, Padfoot. What do you wanna do?"

He grinned, almost in a sadistic way that made James shudder. "Can we explore a secret tunnel? Pleaseeeee?"

James had to admit that sounded more fun than sitting under a tree the whole day.

"Sure, Padfoot. Let's go." So together, the duo stood up and headed over to the secret tunnel by the Whomping Willow.

They walked in a comfortable silence most of the way; walking a little too close than what was normal, their hands and shoulders brushing far too frequently to be anything but questionable. But to be fair, there wasn't much about their lives that was actually normal. Once they were in the tunnel, Sirius led the way towards Honeydukes.

"So, we're sneaking into Hogsmeade?" James asked, breaking the heavy silence.

"I wasn't planning on it."

"…what?" James asked, taken aback. Why were they there, then – if not to sneak into Hogsmeade on a non-Hogsmeade trip day?

Sirius abruptly turned to face him, whipping his entire muscular body around so that he was standing right in front of James. He bumped right into Sirius, unable to stop walking in time. Flushed, James bit his lip and said, "Sorry, why are we here again?"

Sirius grinned, and kissed him full on the lips. James's eyes widened, and after a while, kissed him back roughly. Sirius pressed him against the wall, and James let out a soft moan that echoed throughout the tunnel.

Suddenly, James broke apart. Panting, he said, "Pause break. Okay, honestly. Why are you trying to seduce me?"

Sirius smirked, although James was honestly too caught up in his best friend to care at the moment. He took his damn time, and what after seemed like ten minutes, said, "Because, Prongs. I'm _bored._"

That was the only reason James needed to throw Sirius against the wall and snog him some more; God, the girls were right when they said Sirius was the best snogger in Hogwarts. He had always argued, saying that _he_ was the best at snogging, but _damn_, did Sirius give him a run for his money.

If one were to get a glimpse of them, they would see Sirius pressing James against the wall, snogging him senseless. His hands were in James's hair, although luckily, his hair was so messy as it was that no one would notice the difference. Nothing could be heard except heavy breathing, moaning, and the occasional rustle of clothing as shirts were torn off in a hot, horny desperation. How long had it been since he had gotten any action? James thought idly as Sirius's hands brushed lightly around his chest, and James wrapped a leg around Sirius as he kissed James's neck passionately.

And that was his last thought as Sirius dragged him further into thoughtlessness.

* * *

Excuse Number One: Boredom


End file.
